Day #51:A Safe Space

# 51

Grief is like a ball of string, you start at one end and wind.Then the ball slips through your fingers and rolls across the floor. Some of your work is undone but not all. You pick it up and start over again, but you never have to begin again at the end of the string. The ball never completely unwinds. You’ve made some progress. -Anon; Refuge of Grief fb page. 

Feb. 19, 2010

Safe Space seems to be the reoccuring topic of the past few days.  Two times that it has come up have been 1, describe your safe space; tell us what you see, how did you get it?, What is there?  Is it inside of outside? Describe it in as much detail as you can.  and 2, Imagine your safe space.  Recreate it in your mind.  Meditate on it until you can smell it.  These activities were brought up and used in two different contexts in the past 24 hours.  The first time someone asked me to do the first writing prompt was in a writing group many years ago.   I wrote about being in a Sycamore tree in my grandparent's backyard with my brother, Paul.  Since then I have used it on different occasions. This picture is Paul 5 years ago.  I can't find the poem that Sycamore Tree became, but I remember it because it was so immediate to me.  

The second time is an activity in the Tutu book.  It is calling on people to find a safe space before they begin to tell the stories attached to their traumas and forgiveness.  Again this connects immediately with the literacy work that I have done.  I think what I've always been really good at is creating a safe space for others to learn in.  What I have been doing this year is creating a safe space for myself to tell my story and support others to tell theirs.  It is really important and it is the first time I have done it for myself.

I think part of the creation is going to have to be the "pruning of the trees."  I need to begin to divest myself of stuff.  It makes perfect sense to me that as a single woman in my 60's I need to think about living in smaller environments, therefore, fewer belongings.  This of course feels like a huge undertaking.  Will I be able to prune this tree that has grown over the past 60 years?  

Again the landlord removed more ice off the roof to prepare for two more snowstorms in the next 5 days.  Large hunks of ice circle the ground around my house.  The lawn chair that has appeared in many shots on this blog is underneath that snow pile.  Unfortunately, so are the pipes to my furnace.

So, you all, imagine your safe space in as much detail as you can.  Is your tribe nearby?  If you care to share, please do.