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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Day #55: A Quick Glance At The Book



#55
I worked hard on my book today.  Applause, please.  I'm not sure how to integrate some of what I am learning into this blog.  I have organized 12 interviews.  I have 4 of them fairly well established and mostly written.  Being this far along has lead to some new questions, like what order should I place the stories in?    I have decided to go with a chronological order because the social context of each one is slightly different and we might as well follow an historical perspective.

There are also several issues within the field and each story illustrates a different issue.  There is some duplication , but each story is unique within the larger picture.  For example, several of the interviewed women have had reunions, some of them have lead to positive relationships with a son or daughter, some have lead to extremely difficult relationships, and some have been unsuccessful.  Each stories elements play into the resolution of each pair.  Adoption itself has changed over the past 60 years and I hope that is well defined by these stories. 

The stories themselves will all be told in both narrative and quotes produced by personal  writings and quotes  depending on the writing comfort level of each mom.  I think each story will have its own flavor and that the voice of the individual woman will come through. 

Let me share an example from one of the interviews.   One of the questions I ask is what advice you would give someone who wanted to search.  M.P. suggests "make sure you are feeling strong. It is a fragile undertaking"  "This is not a play you can rewrite."  She goes on to say that we need to forgive ourselves first, maybe not completely, "I don't know if we ever forgive ourselves completely.  I'm not sure I'll ever be there myself." But she knew that the relationship was navigated in a healthier way when she did it because of where she was in her own cycle of self forgiveness.  It helped her to be proactive in her new relationship with her daughter and not just reactive.

 I found a few more blogs that I like, too.  You can get lost in the internet when you start to follow a line of thought from one site to another.  It's kind of crazy how much information is out there and how much is thorough and how much of it is good writing and how much of it isn't.   I'm hoping to give those of you interested in the adoption field examples of well thought out resources. 





OK, this picture was taken a year ago today at the Turners Falls Discovery Center.  I just thought he might make a few of you smile.  Remember this is all about balance.  


Here is one of those links I was talking about, it will take you to an interesting blog.

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